Why Empathic Limits Are Important

“Empathetic limits help your child build positive self-esteem. Even as they are corrected, they know they are still a good person.”- Sarah Rosensweet

When we correct our children, especially if they are sensitive, sometimes what they hear is, “You are bad.” 

We need to make sure that we lead with empathy when we need to correct them. 

If your child hits: “You must have been so upset to hit your brother. At the same time, sweetie, you can tell your brother how you feel. You don’t need to hit.” 

When we lead with empathy and acknowledge our child’s point of view and their feelings, we are letting them know that we understand. They know we still think they are a good person even though they did something wrong. This is important not only for the development of healthy self-worth, but it helps a child take responsibility for their actions when they can do so without feeling shame. It is our empathy that lets them feel remorse: “I did a bad thing,” rather than shame, “I am a bad person.”